Does your boyfriend give too many tantrums?

It is really tough to handle temper tantrums at any given time; more so if it comes from your own soulmate or boyfriend. So, what do you do? Do you run for cover, or cower behind a piece of furniture? Now you can relax and restart the process of handling your volatile guy...

Understanding him
Many emotionally volatile men have difficulty controlling their emotions. He could suffer from borderline personality disorder characteristics, such as mood swings, quick attachment and detachment, a distorted self image, fear of abandonment or a desire to control others through anger or threats to harm himself. He can also be kind, engaging, personable and witty, but when the switch flips, you might find yourself at a loss for what to do. Therapy can help, but he has to want to change.

Require adult behaviour
Your emotionally volatile boyfriend may throw temper tantrums like a young child. He likely uses tantrums to control those around him. Discuss how the tantrums affect you and why you find them objectionable. Discuss other options for venting his emotions when he becomes upset. If he can't control his temper, have him leave until he regains control.

Self-care
Spending time with a guy who can switch moods in an instant, going from sweet to angry or stable to needy, can make you worry about him or feel the need to fix him. Committing yourself to him can create a destructive situation if you decide that you can change him to make him better. If you see yourself as his savior, it's time to realize that he isn't likely to change unless he wants to. Many emotionally volatile men are emotionally unavailable. You might find that breaking up is safer and healthier than is staying with him.

Seek help
If his temper frightens you, or he threatens to hurt himself, insist that he get help if he wants the relationship to continue. You might also need help if you can't figure out why you allow him to control or scare you. If your male partners have followed that pattern, a therapist can help you find out why you are attracted to volatile men and what you need to do to choose healthier relationships.